Finally Turned in the 'ol "V-Card"

So I haven’t posted in a while, but that is not due to a lack of important events. As most of you have heard by now, I finally have had the vasectomy reversal surgery. I would like to take this opportunity to share my experience to aid other men who may be on the fence about getting this relatively simple procedure.

First thing, I had to travel from Tucson, AZ all the way to Fort Lewis, WA. Not a bad trip, but I got in late and it took me some time to get to my hotel…thanks to my best friend Ryan who was visiting a friend in that area, and they invited me out for drinks before my surgery. Anyway, creepy little hotels with no TV aside, it was not a bad trip. Surprisingly, it was very relaxing.
So on Monday the 10^th, I went in for my pre-op appointment. I hadn’t had to have a surgery in quite some time, ironically enough the last time I needed surgery was the last time I saw Ryan prior to this, so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. Honestly, I felt like I was clearing post, getting ready to PCS to another duty station. I had a packet that I had to carry around with me while I stopped at half a dozen offices and hear a bunch of different people tell me the same things. All and all, this portion of the trip wasn’t too exciting, but I do have to let you all know that I felt that the staff at Madigan Army Hospital was phenomenally friendly, knowledgeable, and just plain awesome!

So on Tuesday, the time had finally come to me to turn in my “V-Card”. I would once again have the opportunity to reproduce….a scary thought, I know. But I did feel too nervous, and with a very relaxing staff, I was easily able to stay calm. Once I arrived at the hospital, I signed in and since I was the first case of the day, I got right to business. I got changed into the ass-less gown, and my yellow skid resistant booties (which I decided to keep). I laid down in my bed and had the all star cast from the day prior come over and talk to me one at a time. Finally the anesthesiologist came to set up my IV, and after what felt like five minutes I WAS OUT COLD!

After what felt like five minutes later I WOKE UP! And yes, I kind of felt like Sebastian Janikowski kicked my stuff a whopping 65 yards through the uprights. But even though I didn't feel super great, I did wake up to food in front of me, so that was a pleasant surprise. First thing I did before eating was call Traci, to let her know that I was awake, and doing ok. I’m guessing she could sense that I was still kind of out of it, because we didn’t talk long and she told me to take a nap. She’s too awesome. Now that I think about it, every time I woke up…there was a new plate of food in front of me. Since I went to WA alone, the docs wanted to keep me in the hospital for the night to let the medication run its course allowing me to be able to drive home. My post op nurse was awesome, and to her credit got me extra food when I asked. I got used to the aching south of the border rather quickly. After a while I really didn't feel much at all. That is, until I tried to pee. That was a little difficult the first day, but the discomfort quickly subsided. My time spent in the hospital consisted of eating, sleeping, going pee a lot, and watching TV. I can actually remember what I watched…I watched a gumball marathon on cartoon network and the NBA playoffs. Good times if you ask me.

After I got discharged from the hospital, I spent my last full day there just sleeping, and watching movies (thanks Bruce for your hard drive), and talking to Traci on the phone. That pain wasn’t really pain, more of an annoying discomfort from time to time. Nothing to really complain about. Actually, I didn’t and haven’t taken ANY pain meds since I left the hospital.

Then I flew back home, had Traci pick me up, and we feasted….on Chick-Fil-A….and it was amazing. Then we all went home, and all was good in the world. I truly feel as though the hardest step to get to is now behind us, and now we have to face the one that will test our patience as a couple, and that’s actually conceiving. Needless to say, I have recovered to the point when we can start trying, and I am feeling just fine.  I appear to be all healed up and now the next thing to do will be to have my follow up and get a semen analysis done, to make sure that the surgery did what it was set out to do.

Time moves on and it’s time to prepare for the next leg of our journey. I feel like I'll get there faster since I got that V-Card that was in my wallet not weighing me down.

Til Next Time,

Jay

Let the FUN Begin!

Today marks one week post surgery. Everything seems to be healing nicely. Jay says he hardly notices it and that it's almost completely healed. The doctor recommended we wait two to three weeks before trying to conceive and so far we've made it a week. The doctor did say for Jay to pay attention to his body and his pain levels because it will be the first to tell him if he's pushing himself too hard or if he's ready. Hopefully, we can try this cycle but we'll see. We have about a week long window to try to get pregnant and it begins before his two weeks are up so hopefully he's feeling up to it sooner than later. If we get pregnant this month, I'd be due late March or early April and would have the baby here in Arizona. 

I did contact Sacred Healing Arts in Hawaii. They seem to be the only office that has home birth midwives in all of Oahu. I told them our circumstance and asked if they aid in home births after c-sections (HBACs). They emailed me back saying that they did do HBACs and would like to do a phone interview with me. I'm not sure if I should "waste" their time just yet as I don't even know if I'll be having a baby out there. I was just emailing them to see if they were even an option because if not I'd probably have to fly someone in to assist me. I do have someone in mind but I don't think they thought I was serious. So if you're reading this... I'm as serious as a heart attack! I don't want to go through another c-section unless it is absolutely medically necessary and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to avoid it until that point. 

Of course once they know my history, they'll be better able to tell me if they would be able to assist me through an HBAC but since I've done so much research and spoken with other midwives, I don't believe there is a reason for me not to attempt an HBAC. 

As I start realizing that pregnancy is becoming closer to a reality, I'm day dreaming of baby furniture and cloth diapers. Would it be too early to start a registry? I suppose I could always change my mind about things I want and it's not set in stone on the registry. Plus knowing what I was having might change a few things but I'm just so excited and want something to occupy my time that isn't just all about trying to conceive. We've thought of names for both boys and girls. We've discussed the fact that we want to cloth diaper, and breast feed. We're discussing our options for co-sleeping and different cradles, pack n plays or bassinets for the baby to have available to him in our bedroom besides the crib in the nursery.  I don't want to jinx anything by purchasing anything just yet but I'm so anxious to do so. I thought maybe a registry would help ease my shopping desires. What do you think? Set up a registry or not yet? 

Until next time,
<3 Traci

And on to Step Two!!

(8:21 am 11 June 2013) This morning at 6 am, Jay went in to Madigan Army Medical Center for his vasectomy reversal. Sadly, I'm still in Arizona and I'm not really sure what time he went into surgery. He last posted saying he was going back around 7 am so hopefully he'll be done in the next few hours and I'll hear something from him. I'm thinking I probably will not hear from him until noon or later. I'm anxiously waiting to hear what the doctor tells him and if they think there is a change. Once they are in surgery, the doctors will have a better view of things and know whether or not things might function again. Even if the doctors see that things should heal fine, that doesn't necessarily mean that little guys will start swimming again. Fortunately we're young (ish) and he hasn't had the vasectomy for very long. The optimal time to do the reversal is in the first 3-4 years, which we're about to hit 4 years next February or March-ish time frame. So hopefully, everything turns out well and we can start trying to conceive in the next few weeks, depending on how long the say we have to wait. During my research I've heard the wait can be anywhere from 2 weeks to 6 weeks. I feel like I'm running out of things to say but I'm anxiously waiting to hear back from Jay.  I suppose since I don't feel as though I have enough to post, I'll save it until I hear from Jay.

(5:05 pm 11 June 2013) So Jay was finished with surgery around 1 pm and seemed to be fine. He was told everything went great and would hear from the doctors later. He sounded drowsy so our conversation was quick so he could get some more rest. He then called me again around 4:30 to let me know that the doctor had come in to talk to him. The doctor said everything went as planned and that we can start trying in about 2-3 weeks as long as he was feeling better and was up for it. He will have an analysis done in 3 months to make sure everything is a go, we might know sooner than that though! Hehe. I'm already wishing I could run out and buy a bunch of new baby stuff. I'm going to be dreaming of baby names, cloth diapers and nursery furniture. I've started looking for midwives in this area and in Hawaii. I've counted due dates based on when we might get pregnant. If you can't tell, I'm very very excited to finally have some control over our situation. Now we just wait for him to heal up and we'll be officially TTC (trying to conceive)!!

<3 Traci

Almost done with Step one!

After my state of panic was over, Jay and I figured it all out. My mother bought the flight to Seattle and Jay figured out all the rest. I booked his rental car and his hotel. His flight left yesterday at 3:35pm and arrived in Seattle at 10:50pm. He got his car and found his hotel. I'm not sure if he did all this with out a problem but he did get there. Today he'll have his pre-op appointment followed by his surgery tomorrow. They will keep him in the hospital over night since he's on his own and he'll fly out on Thursday.

I'm so excited and we don't even know if the surgery will be a success or not. Even if it is, that doesn't mean that we will be able to get pregnant right away, or at all for that matter. I'm not trying to be negative, just trying to be realistic and know that there are several different factors that stand between us and the desired outcome. As much as I'd love to start scooping up baby stuff as soon as possible. I'm trying to be logical and realistic about it. The excitement of it all has me itching to shop and day dream about nurseries, names and cloth diapers! Despite my attempts at being logical and realistic, yesterday morning before Jay's flight, we sat and discussed various baby names. We talked about what we liked and what we didn't like. It's so hard to keep from day dreaming that I suppose discussions is all I have to quench my thirst at this point. I know everything is one step at a time but it's so much more fun to look ahead and plan that next step while waiting anxiously for the current step to be completed! I guess only time will tell and as things progress I'll keep everyone updated on our journey.

Patience is a Virtue

Waiting is hard. No matter what you are waiting for you are either waiting anxiously or wishing that time would slow down. In our case, we wanted it to hurry up and get here. Now it's here and we kind of wish we had more time. We've spent most of the last 3.5 months saving money for this day and when it came, we had spent almost all of our savings. Why you ask? Because we went on vacation and bought a new car and thought we had enough time after returning home to rebuild our savings before we got the phone call. We returned home on Sunday, 2 June. We received the phone call with a surgery date, on Wednesday 5 June. Sadly we had no time between returning home and getting our phone call to make the proper changes and additions to our savings account. So now we are scrambling to get Jay to Seattle in time for his surgery next week. While this is stressful, we are so excited for this to finally be happening. 

While I stress, pull string and beg family for help, we are at the point we've been waiting for since February. We started our journey in February when we made the decision to expand our family. While this is a big step, it's only the first step. We fought for about a month and half to get on a wait list at a military installation that preforms vasectomy reversals, until we finally got on the list at Joint Base Lewis McChord's Madigan Army Medical Hospital. We were told at the end of March that the wait would be around 4-6 months. Every week since Jay was put on the wait list, he has called the Urology clinic to ask if there has been any progress and an estimate on how much longer he'd be on the list. He even made a phone call this Tuesday (4 June) and heard the same thing we have been hearing since day one, you are 24th on the list, no scheduled surgeries and none have been preformed. We were losing hope. Scratch that, I think we lost hope, we were just going through the motions at this point to see if it would turn out. I never thought we'd get a phone call the following day to be scheduled for surgery 5 days later.

So as of right now, Jay should fly into Seattle on Sunday 9 June and he'll have his pre-op appointment on Monday 10 June with surgery on 11 June. It's not looking like I'll be able to go with him since we weren't able to build up our savings again, we'll be lucky to scrap together enough to get Jay to Seattle, a hotel room and a car for the 4 days he's there but at least we'll be able to get it done! Now we have to PRAY that this surgery works and that we are able to get pregnant. We're hoping to get pregnant sometime in the next 6 months but we've heard that it could take up to 18 months, if the surgery is a go. Lots and lots of variables and we're betting on them all. 

So we're stressing quite a bit right now, due to trying to get Jay up there and getting the surgery done. Stressing that it goes well, stressing that we're able to get pregnant sooner than later. Stressing that we CAN get pregnant. Stressing that if/when we do get pregnant, that my birth options remain the way I want them. Just plain ol' stressing. I know one way or another things will work out but I just can't help but stress. It's my nature. I almost enjoy it. Anyway, things are looking up, even if we aren't as prepared as we had planned to be but it's all in God's hands and we have to trust in Him.

<3 
Traci

And time slowly marches on...

We haven't posted in almost a month and that's because there hasn't been anything to update. Jay calls Madigan Army Medical Center every Monday to find out where he is on the wait list and so far every single Monday he finds out that the list hasn't moved at all. 

Though this week we did find out that we will be stationed in Hawaii come next year. So now I'm looking at birthing options in Hawaii. I hear that Tripler Army Medical Center is VBAC friendly but I'm assuming it's as VBAC friendly as some of the other hospitals I've found. They do them, in very perfect and selective conditions. Though I have found another option for a home birth on Oahu, HI though the cost is higher than I'm used to. I gotta get used to this "everything costs more in Hawaii" thing. It will be worth it if I end up being able to have the birth I desire. 

I just hope our housing is large enough for me to labor in a birthing tub. I was kind of hoping to find something with a large garden tub but nothing in Hawaii is large except for prices! And if I got a house off post that I'd want to live in, we'd be paying more than we could afford. I'd much rather pay for a midwife and a home birth over a larger home. Housing looks fairly nice and if we have a 3rd, we'd more than likely qualify for a 4th bedroom. I just hope we can get pregnant before we get over there. It would even be nice to have the baby over here before going over there. But that's just me being hopeful! 

Until Next Time
 <3 Traci

Excitement in Waiting

Well, I am officially on Madigan’s waitlist for my procedure! I know Traci already posted on this, but I wanted to share just how excited I am about this whole thing. Its takes me making steps forward in a situation like this for it to feel real. Although we still have many other things that need to fall into place, we are moving in the right direction. I feel like the worst part is behind us and I truly feel that we can only move forward from here. With our limited timeline, and the timeline Madigan gave us, it appears that I will have my procedure completed prior to me leaving for WOCS! Even if we don’t have ample time to get pregnant prior to my school, the hardest part will be complete, and we will be able to try any time after that.

Now we get into what I consider the “fun part”, and believe it or not, its looking through all the different things that we will need to get for the baby once we conceive. Everything from co-sleepers, to strollers, to clothes. All of these things make this whole experience seem like its coming to us at a faster pace. I guess that things like that, and planning our pending PCS help this whole waiting period not seem too mundane. I guess anything to help pass the time.

Today Elijah started back up at school and his teachers gave him nothing but praise when I came to pick him up. I was honestly worried about him going back, especially with how he can act at home. I really couldn’t be more proud of that little guy, and its these kind of events that make me excited about another child. I was able to relive the moments I had with Jayson, through Eli, and now I’ll be able to relive those moments again with our future child. I can’t express the joy this thought brings me.

Well, I know this has been one of my shorter posts, but I just wanted to give you all my update, and thank you all again for reading these posts. Once again, it means the world to Traci and I.

Til next Time,

Jay

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

Yesterday, we called to find out where we were on the wait list. We got a whole bunch of info, from where we are on the wait list, how long it should take us to get called, to how they deal with calling locals vs non-locals for cancellations. It was all very interesting and sounded as fair as they could be.

First of all, we're 21 out of 25 on the list. The scheduler said it would take about 4-6 months with being that position. I think we will call once a week to find out what position on the list we are. We also informed them we are willing to take cancellations and could come up with little notice. That's when they explained that they call locals on the list when they have a few days to a few hours notice because they don't have to worry about as much travel time to get there. Now if they have a few or more days notice to call people for the cancelled appointment, they give out of town patients on the wait list first dibs. I feel this is fair as I'm sure there are quite a few last minute cancellations and the locals get called quite often. Either way, the list is moving and eventually we'll be at the top with a week or so notice to get up there. As much as I'd love to be called for a cancellation, I don't really mind WHO get's called as long as those appointments are being filled and the line is progressing. Back in February they did 15 surgeries that month. Hopefully, they'll keep up a similar pace and we'll be called in 3-4 months. 

Our current schedule of events fits nicely into that 4-6 month window, if we are able to get called before that 6th month is up. As of yesterday, 4-6 months would be early August to early October. Jay leaves for WOCC late October so it could work out perfectly, if he gets seen with in that time frame. Of course if he goes in August, he'll be all healed and we might even have the opportunity to try for a cycle or two before he leaves. If we get pregnant before he leaves, we could have another summer baby. So I'll either be ready to pop over a move or moving with a newborn. Eh, it sounds do-able to me! 

I just have to wait for that phone call that Jay has a date for surgery and see where it all goes. I'm sure something will end up not perfect but if we're able to get this surgery done, I'll be happy! Timing won't matter as much anymore, unless there is a deployment on the horizon. With our luck, we'll get word that Jay's deploying and then 2 weeks later I'll find out I'm pregnant. How many babies can we possibly have while he's gone? Maybe we'll be able to avoid another deployment baby and have an R&R baby. If there is even any R&R to get pregnant during. Only time will tell. With the draw downs, I'm sure we're not as likely to have deployment babies as we were in the past. 

I'll give you guys another update when there is something new to update you with! :) 

Until Next Time!

<3 Traci

Sunshine on a Rainy Day

We can all only imagine what a family goes through in tough times. Some are more severe than others, but regardless of the situation, we try and be there for all parties involved. We listen to stories, try and give our “expert” advice, and just do anything we can to support where we can. A big way people have supported Traci and I has been reading this blog and continually making sure we’re doing well, and encouraging us to keep trucking on, even when things look grim.

If you have been following us recently, you know that we have ran into numerous road blocks on our journey to extend our family. Everything from referrals getting screwed up, to finding out some options aren’t feasible for our family, to thinking that this ultimately will not happen. Well let me just say that the Lord works in mysterious ways.

A couple weeks ago, it seemed like this whole thing really wasn’t going to happen. Traci and I were eating at Chilis discussing what we should try and do next. As the conversation drew to a close, we decided that we would put a time limit on how long we would continue trying to find ways to make this all work. Once that was decided, I became very fearful that another child just may not be in the cards. And I really was quite sad about it all.

Then Traci, in her infinite wisdom, suggested that I approach patient advocacy about the referrals getting messed up. And guess what. As usual, her idea played out in our favor! My referral was overruled and switched to Madigan Army Hospital. So now I am on a wait list and anxiously waiting for that phone call to come in. I am now feeling like we finally have a foot in the door. Traci and I even discussed what I would do if I got a call to have the procedure during our trip to Vegas. Well, needless to say we both agreed that this is a once in a blue moon type opportunity and we can plan another Vegas trip to include myself sometime down the road.

So we’re in it to win it now folks and I cannot thank you enough for the continued support. Please keep reading and commenting, because it means the world to our family.

 Til Next Time,

Jay

One Step Closer

Jay called Madigan AMC at Fort Lewis this morning to find out if they had received his referral yet. They did! YAY! Thank goodness! I was so nervous that a repeat denial would happen. After being burned once, it's hard to trust that all will work out perfectly the second go-round. 

While speaking with the Urology department at Madigan, he asked what the wait list looked like now. Our information was outdated since we received our information over a month ago. He was informed that the wait list was about 6 to 9 months long but due to cancellations, we could receive a call in as little as 30 days from now. Since Madigan is probably the largest location with the most frequent surgeries done, a lot of people tend to get on the wait list there and then cancel due to PCS, TDY, change of heart or deployments. (PCS - Permanent Change of Station, TDY - Temporary Duty Assignment) 

How that works is that when the surgery scheduler calls to schedule surgery for the next patient in line and they have to cancel or postpone, the scheduler then calls the next person in line until they reach someone who can come for the next available surgery. Let's say there are 60 patients on the waiting list. They call #1 and he can't come to that scheduled surgery but wants to remain on the list. So they call down the line until #25 says that he can make it to the scheduled surgery. All the patients from #1-24 remain and everyone from #26 down to #60 move up one slot. If #1 drops out, the same happens except everyone from #2-24 move up one, and everyone from #26 to 60 move up two. 

We've been informed that if we receive a call, we could have as little as a week or a few days to get out there for the surgery. So it looks like we'll be saving as much money between now and when we receive that call. We have even agreed that he would miss out on our family vacation scheduled for May if they call him with a date that would interfere. 

If he does receive a call in the next 5 months and we're able to get pregnant right away (slim chance), I would be able to have the baby here, which I've already had a couple people giving me information on local OBs and home birth Midwives. I would love to have a baby here! So many important people here that I'd want to meet my new bundle of joy! I'm starting to get off track here. Daydreaming about having the baby here. I suppose one can never been too prepared! 

Until next time,
<3 Traci